Source: Horntip Collection - Half-Mind Hymnal 2011

Lyrics

(Last verse by Flying Booger)

We’re coming, we’re coming, Our brave little band, On the right side of justice, We’ll all take a stand. We don’t smoke tobacco because we all think, That people who smoke are likely to drink.

CHORUS: Away, away with rum by gum, With rum by gum, with rum by gum, Away, away with rum by gum, The song of the Salvation Army. Rum chug-a-lug, rum chug-a-lug, rum bum bum.

We never eat fruit cake, Cause fruit cake has rum, And one little bite turns a man to a bum. Oh, can you imagine a sorrier sight, Than a man eating fruit cake until he is light?

We never eat cookies, Cause cookies have yeast, And one little bite turns a man to a beast. Oh, can you imagine a greater disgrace, Than a man in the gutter with crumbs on his face?

There’s Viceroy cigarettes for people who think, And Ban deodorant for people who stink, But thinking and stinking are not right by me, I get my kicks from Saigon tea.

We never eat candy, ‘cause candy has brandy, And brandy is known to make a drunk randy. Oh, can you imagine a sight more disgustin’, Than a sot in the gutter with his loins a-thrustin’?